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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26674351">Simplest Answer</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsteraVoid/pseuds/AsteraVoid'>AsteraVoid</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>HLVRAI - Fandom, Half Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Gordon is a bartender and Benrey is a customer turned roommate, I have no time nor patience to write out this full idea, I just have brainrot, It is quite literally 'what if everything was different?', M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 13:14:13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,846</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26674351</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsteraVoid/pseuds/AsteraVoid</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Gordon Freeman, with his MIT education and stellar resume, could not land a job at Black Mesa nor Aperture Science, and instead became a bartender in the city. One customer has become an unlikely friend after spending enough time around him, and eventually becomes his roommate.</p><p>This is a moment where they spent an evening drinking and are on their way home.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Benrey/Gordon Freeman</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>109</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Simplest Answer</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>tbh this is like. a snapshot of an AU i have where gordon’s a smart guy with a fancy MIT degree that couldn’t land a job at Black Mesa and instead works as a bartender, and benrey isn’t some eldritch security guard and is instead a game dev with a penchant for coming to gordon’s place of work and paying him to make god awful drinks while benrey <strike>flirts with</strike> bothers him. bubby and coomer are the owners of the bar, and tommy’s dad owns the whole building, which means tommy comes to hang out and talk to them all.</p><p>i tried so hard to make it 3k words and fell just a little short rip</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Benrey stood there in the alleyway, hands clasped together in front of him, shaking his intertwined hands. He wore a plain dark blue hoodie and grey sweatpants with a beanie to match. “C’moooooon, please? Please for Benrey? I’m asking nicely.”</p><p>Gordon sighed, pushing up his glasses to pinch the bridge of his nose.</p><p>“No, I’m not giving you a piggyback ride.”</p><p>“Why not? I take you to this nice bar, we have drinks, we laugh, and now you won’t give me a piggyback ride home? Ice cold, Barman.”</p><p>Gordon knew this wasn’t a battle he was going to win. Benrey was too stubborn to back down, and he was too impatient to wait for Benrey to move on from the topic. From the way Benrey was swaying, maybe it wasn’t that awful of an idea to help him out.</p><p>But Gordon wasn’t going to give in without one last push back.</p><p>“First off, this is where I work. Second, we came here together because we <em>walked</em>, there was no invitation or ‘taking me out’, and third, it’s not my fault that you drank four of… whatever the hell you made me make on my day <em>off</em>.”</p><p>Benrey ignored him. “Please? Thank you, please?”</p><p>Gordon sighed and knelt. The chipped asphalt dug into his jeans and the ground was wet, his knee and lower leg really loving the sensation with extra weight added on as Benrey clambered over him.</p><p>It took a moment for Benrey to get situated before Gordon pushed himself upright, his hands tucked under Benrey’s thighs with two sleeved arms draped over his chest like drawstrings. Once he started walking, however, those arms wrapped around his shoulders, starting on one side and ending on the other.</p><p>Benrey was shorter than him but not by much, and he was much heftier. It only took a few minutes of walking for Gordon to start breaking a sweat. If Benrey noticed, he didn’t say anyth—Actually, he <em>was</em> talking. Gordon hadn’t been listening.</p><p>As he pressed on, the heat against his back became reassuring, as was the rumbling that reverberated through him as Benrey spoke. His voice had always been on the deeper side, even deeper now with the lackadaisical tone and slurring.</p><p>“—Barely passed his class, idiot professor. You make fun of his nerd ass costume <em>once</em> and suddenly you’re on some, uh, shit list. It was Halloween, I couldn’t help myself.”</p><p>Gordon made a sound of agreement, not really paying attention. It wasn’t that he didn’t care, it was just sometimes Benrey would talk about the same topic so long Gordon couldn’t stop from checking out mentally. His mind would catch on something Benrey mentioned, though; a haircut he used to have, an outfit he wore at the time, the people he hung out with, and Gordon would imagine it.</p><p>What exactly would a younger Benrey have been like? Did he have any phases? What led him to where and who he was now? How many friends did he have?</p><p>He imagined a glimpse into a world he couldn’t fathom. He always wondered how different it would have been if he had been there, too.</p><p>Gordon inserting himself into those projected memories typically ended in him breaking the daydream, feeling embarrassed and stupid. He had no business knowing, no real incentive or reason to even think of it, but for some reason his chest squeezed at the notion of lost time. Of the possibility that he could have known Benrey earlier, when they were younger, and experienced all the trouble they could have gotten into when they were dumber and more willing to take risks.</p><p>As it were now, neither of them knew how to do much besides be shut-ins and procrastinators.</p><p>“Hey.” Benrey drawled.</p><p>“Hmm?” Gordon turned his head slightly to look at Benrey from the corner of his eye. His arms were still wrapped around Gordon’s neck, head resting on his own arm, gaze catching Gordon’s.</p><p>Gordon looked away.</p><p>“Y’even listening? I’m out here spilling the beans on m’whole life story and you’re just… zoned out. Worst speedrunner ever. You don’t even have the fast shoes equipped. Got ugly ass flip-flops on with what? A -3 stamina debuff?”</p><p>Gordon rolled his eyes and readjusted his hold on Benrey’s legs. The movement made Benrey tense up, arms closing a little tighter around Gordon’s neck, causing him to struggle for a second before Benrey relaxed.</p><p>“Dude, shut up. You’re lucky I’m carrying your sorry ass home at all. I could have just left you to call an Uber.”</p><p>“Mmmm, but ‘cha didn’t. ‘Cause you like your good pal Benrey too much to leave him alone with a stranger. Don’t want me to get kidnapped or somethin’.”</p><p>“I’d be more worried about the driver than you.” Gordon muttered.</p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>“Nothing.”</p><p>Benrey shifted, face a little bit closer to Gordon’s own, his breath tickling Gordon’s neck. They had about ten more minutes till they reached their apartment.</p><p>“May not be the fastest gamer, but you’re strong enough to carry me this round, so that counts for something.” His voice was softer then, hands playing with the fabric of Gordon’s shirt where it sat on his shoulders. “Warm, too. And kinda sweaty, but that’s okay.” There was a fondness in his voice that was made all the more intimate with how close they were said to his ear.</p><p>Gordon felt his face heat up.</p><p>“Yeah, well…” He didn’t really know how to respond to that.</p><p>Which was fine, because by the time he thought of something Benrey had relaxed, hands stilling and breath evening out against Gordon’s back.</p><p>He’d fallen asleep.</p><p>And that meant Gordon could blame the tone of Benrey’s voice on drowsiness <em>and</em> alcohol. No need to look further into it. There was always a simple explanation and that was the only one he ever needed.</p><p>The rest of the walk was in silence, Gordon’s mind pleasantly blank as he walked up to their apartment door. It took a few tries to get it open since Benrey’s knee would bump against the door every time Gordon grabbed the handle, but eventually he managed and trudged them both inside.</p><p>Thankfully they were only on the second floor, which was a small set of stairs that Gordon ascended absolutely gracefully and with relative ease, and totally not with fear and imbalance in every step. Making it down the hall, he fished his keys out of his jacket pocket and opened their door, flicking on the hallway light as he stepped in, Benrey unaware about the whole ordeal.</p><p>The man was dead weight, slight snoring starting up as Gordon arrived to their bedroom. Benrey’s bed was against the wall across from the door, and Gordon realized he had to actually get Benrey off of him to complete his task.</p><p><em>Stealth mission</em>, he absentmindedly thought to himself, Benrey’s voice narrating the phrase.</p><p>He moved so that he was crouched in front of Benrey’s bed, his back facing it. The bed wasn’t that far off the ground even with the frame and box spring—which he had convinced Benrey to buy after finding out he kept his bed on the floor without any sheets or pillowcases—so his kneeling put his midback at about the same level as the mattress itself. He didn’t want to let go of Benrey’s legs in the off chance that doing so would cause him to flop over on his side, even though they touched the floor now, so he opted to instead wiggle his shoulders so Benrey’s slackened hold around his neck slipped, the movement sending his torso back onto the mattress, his lower half hanging off.</p><p>Satisfied, Gordon moved to stand, arms starting to slip out from behind Benrey’s knees when they tensed and swung back, slamming Gordon against the metal frame in a way that sent unpleasant shocks all the way down to his toes. He held in a hiss, leaning forward so he could glare back at Benrey.</p><p>“We’re home and you’re in bed, dude. Ease up so I can shower.”</p><p>Benrey didn’t move. “Mmm, don’t goooooo, haha…. Leavin’ me in this cold ass room, not even tucking me in and giving your bro a kiss goodnight… Fuckin’ rude, Barman. No bedside service?”</p><p>Gordon took a deep breath to keep his voice even. “I might have if you stayed asleep, but since you’re awake I think you can handle yourself just fine.” He shook off Benrey’s legs and stood, rolling out his shoulders. “Besides, it’s not as if you’re not hot as hell with all the alcohol in system.”</p><p>“You callin’ me hot?”</p><p>Gordon could hear the smile in his voice and chose not to take the bait this time. Getting into pedantic and misleading arguments with Benrey wasn’t all that enjoyable when he was sober, and wasn’t likely to be much better drunk. Gordon opted to walk away instead, stopped only by a warm hand gripping his wrist.</p><p>“Gordon.”</p><p>He didn’t hear the old, rickety bed creak when Benrey sat upright, and he wasn’t even sure he really heard Benrey call him by his first name, since he seldom did. But the skin contact and the soft tone of voice gave him pause, so he turned back to look.</p><p>Neither of them said anything. Gordon’s shadow from the hallway light loomed over Benrey, whose features were dimmed by the darkness and the perpetual beanie that went all the way down to his eyebrows. He really did hate the damn thing, same with all of Benrey’s clothes. The baggy hoodies, the sweatpants, the oversized sweaters, it was as if he wanted to hide every inch of himself, cover it all up until there was nothing left but his words, his laugh, the idea of him more than the image.</p><p>Gordon understood it, but it drove him wild. He needed to know. He needed to understand. He wanted to see it all and map it out in his mind so he never forgot. So Benrey couldn’t hide, couldn’t pretend to be confused, couldn’t deflect. So they were finally on even ground. He didn’t understand why that mattered to him, and some small part of his brain told him to move closer, take that fucking beanie off and lean down to—</p><p>He must have been quiet too long. Benrey let his wrist go, the same hand moving to rub the back of his neck as he looked past Gordon’s shoulder and then down.</p><p>“Ah. Nothing. Go shower, stinky ass. Your-your hand’s sweaty, Sweatman. Eck, gross.”</p><p>Benrey made a disgusted face and stuck his tongue out, and Gordon let him. He let him bow out of their little game, too scared to take the stage.</p><p>“You weren’t holding my hand.” Was all Gordon managed to say, though Benrey didn’t hear him.</p><p>He was too busy kicking off his shoes and rolling over to face the wall, drunkenly fumbling with the sheets before crawling under them. They were a hideous tie dye, something Benrey bought because Gordon told him not to.</p><p>Once he settled in he took one deep breath and relaxed, apparently done with Gordon for the night. That was fine.</p><p>Gordon stood in front of his bed for a moment longer, eyes following the sliver of skin from Benrey’s ear to his cheekbone that rested between the end of his beanie and the start of his comforter. Another way of covering himself up, all that was left of his was the bit of skin and his nose peeking out. He ignored the tinge of color there, blaming it on the alcohol.</p><p>It was always the easiest answer that was the best to choose.</p><p>After that he allowed his brain to run on autopilot. Thoughts blissfully quiet as he grabbed a pair of pajamas from his dresser—which was to the left of Benrey’s bed, in the corner—and slipped into the bathroom. The sound of running water from the showerhead filled his eardrums as he washed sweat and grime away, fatigue worming its way into his brain and making his eyelids heavy. He barely registered turning off the water and drying off, an old MIT shirt and some aged track shorts his sleepwear.</p><p>Gordon wiped the steam from the mirror with his towel. Looking at his fogged visage in the mirror, he couldn’t help but note that he hadn't gone for a jog in a while.</p><p>His life took quite the turn into left field when he met Benrey. From annoying customer to acquaintance to roommate, and to think it all started when he took a cigarette from him in the alley outside the bar. If it hadn’t been Benrey’s last, would they still have met to talk the next night? The night after?</p><p>The heat of the bathroom obscured his reflection once more. The spot where he had wiped it away was still noticeable.</p><p>Maybe he’s been hiding, too.</p><p>His hand flicked the light switch and he made his way down the hall back to their bedroom. Benrey hadn’t moved since he left, still curled and covered, and Gordon couldn’t tell by his breathing, but he doubted that Benrey was asleep. He stopped at the doorframe, shadow over Benrey’s bed again, and weighed his options.</p><p>They both pressed each other’s buttons on the regular, but never pressed for more. They were content to be on the edge of something, the allure of unplanned and unexpected affection, of comfort that bordered something more but never quite made it there. The knowledge that they got under each other’s skin, but it wasn't to cause pain. It was just their way of figuring each other out. He didn’t have to do anything more. It wasn’t required.</p><p>And if this had been a few months ago, before they moved in together to ‘save money’, to have alternating cooking and cleaning days, to buy a toothbrush holder and actually have more than one in it, maybe he would have went and climbed into his own bed.</p><p>But before he could talk himself out of it he turned off the hallway light. It was pitch black, the window by his dresser permitting a dim glow of moonlight that did nothing for his vision. He closed the door with a quiet creak and a click. He preferred it that way, frankly, though Benrey didn’t since he got up to piss all the time. It didn’t matter to Gordon, he’s always been a light sleeper, and the creak of the door opening made him feel better. Someone’s up, someone’s there, someone can protect him if he can’t protect himself.</p><p>Not that he’d ever admit that, though.</p><p>He pulled back the ugly tie dye sheets that he hated and crawled under the covers. His hair was damp and it would be tangled in the morning, but that was a problem for future him. Future Gordon was going to have a lot to deal with tomorrow.</p><p>Oh well.</p><p>He’s almost pressed to Benrey’s back, acutely aware of how still he was, how his breathing gave him away. Before anything else, Gordon propped himself up on his elbow and reached up to tug Benrey’s beanie off, tucking it under his pillow. His eyes adjusted to the dark, allowing him to make out the pitch black mess of Benrey’s hair. He saw it so rarely he almost wanted to climb out of bed and turn on the lights to get a better view of it but decided against it. He didn’t want to risk Benrey saying something and ruining the moment.</p><p>So he scooched closer, finally pressing against Benrey’s back, feeling how warm he was from being under the covers so long. The arm propping him up moved in to touch Benrey’s hair, his other arm coming up and over his side. It wasn’t a comfortable position, the arm under him going numb and cramping while touching Benrey’s hair, but like hell he was going to pass up on doing this. </p><p>His hair was kind of greasy, which wasn’t a surprise given that he hadn’t showered all day and spent the remainder of the evening in a stuffy bar drinking and laughing his ass off, but Gordon didn’t mind. He carded his fingers through it, thumbed the thinner hairs that trailed off by Benrey’s ear. He considered planting a kiss there for a moment.</p><p>Benrey finally relaxed, letting out a long exhale as he moved his arm to rest over Gordon’s, fingers slipping between his own in a terrible form of hand holding that somehow seemed so much more personal than if it were done right. Benrey gave his hand a squeeze and Gordon squeezed back.</p><p>Gordon settled in, hand retreating from Benrey’s hair and slipping under his own pillow, face just behind Benrey’s neck. He brought his legs closer, and Benrey kicked at the sheets to knock his own back, icy feet touching Gordon’s calves. He flinched from it.</p><p>Benrey laughed something small and pleased. “Kept them nice and cold just for you.”</p><p>“Thanks, I hate you.” There was no malice in his words.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i probably won’t be doing more with this because 1) i know nothing about bartending 2) i know nothing about game deving and 3) i have 0 time to research nor write about it anyway because of college ;-;</p><p>hope y'all enjoyed! sorry if it’s OOC but like. i have stripped them of a lot of their base appeal and put them in a completely new environment and new roles anyway so! it's more self indulgent than anything :)</p><p>some facts about this AU:</p><p>benrey is a long time customer and only starts a real conversation up with gordon when he's closing up the bar and takes out the trash, benrey hanging out smoking in the alleyway by the dumpster and gordon decides to steal benrey's last cigarette as he smokes it as payback for all the gross, convoluted drinks he has to make for him, but promises to buy him another pack by the next evening</p><p>then they start hanging out because neither of them really have friends, and it goes from there</p><p>gordon has his arm in this AU, but does have trauma from prior events that don't involve benrey or the science team (i think being in a hostage situation like a really drawn out, bad and bloody bank robbery)</p><p>joshua exists in this AU but he's adopted by them later on down the road</p><p>in essence: nothing is the same and i just like to take all these ideas and rotate them in my mind :)</p><p>EDIT: wow! almost 300 hits and 80 kudos! that's more people than i can fit in my house! incredible! thanks for the kind words and for moving your eyes all over this funky little internet page &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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